A year or so into developing our D/s within our marriage, Cuiplash and I established a small but significant tradition in our relationship. As busy professionals with young children, quality time together can often be difficult to navigate. And so, our D/s dinner tradition was borne out of a desire to dedicate specific time alone to each other and our dynamic at home.
Our D/s dinners have evolved to become cherished evenings where depending on Cuiplash’s intention, we may practice a higher protocol dynamic or a more relaxed one, relevant to the needs of each other at the time. There are evenings when we are both dressed up for each other, Cuiplash cutting a dashing form in a dress shirt and slacks, myself dressed to please and arouse in corsets, stockings and heels. There are times when kink comes into play and I’m ankle cuffed to the table or bound to the chair. Sometimes he will tell me specifically what he would me like to wear, other times to surprise him. There have been times when we have been CM/nf, other times we have both been in jeans and T-shirts.
For it isn’t so much about how we are dressed or what we eat and drink. Our private tradition is flexible in protocol as it is primarily about meeting the needs of each other and honouring our relationship. Taking time away from TV and phones and all manners of day to day distractions and allowing us the opportunity to focus entirely on each other and how we are doing, individually and as a couple, as Dom and as sub.
Cuiplash always cooks, on a daily basis, and this may go against traditional roles, but he is a fine chef and a gentleman and, to him, preparing meals is very much about looking after me and our children. His intention is to care for us and feed us well, plus I am rather hopeless at it! When we have one of our private D/s dinners my role is to take time to dress our table and myself (or not) and his is to cook for us to enjoy, to create flavours and scents to relish at our leisure over candlelight. We create a bubble of us, in our kitchen, in our home.
And as we savour his meal, we talk and we laugh, sometimes even cry. We discuss things deeply, we raise concerns and we create solutions. We check in and evaluate our path. We tease and we flirt, we admire and we seduce. We respect and we honour. We are grateful and we thank. Our tradition honours our relationship, our partnership, our marriage and our D/s.
And when our feast has been eaten, and our wine has been drunk we will take time to enjoy each other more. Sometimes we will play, I may be bent over the table and spanked then fucked, or curled up in his lap on the sofa to nap, or we lie together naked in bed, snuggling as we make plans.
Our tradition creates space, it maintains intimacy, it encourages vulnerability and sustains authenticity. It celebrates our love and our lives. It honours who we are and how we’ve grown. A simple act of having a meal together at home, as husband and wife and as Dom and sub, has become a treasured tradition for us both.
Footnote – the Gentleman’s Collection Cabernet Sauvignon comes highly recommended by Cuiplash. Each bottle has a different slogan on the label. I bought him this one as a gift as it epitomised him, ‘Others First’.
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